"Name That Tune" was my grandfather's favorite game show, and he was the man who taught me how to score a game. But I digress.
We could more reasonably have music between innings as selected by the next pitcher - music to warm up to. Each Wiffler could select the song they wanted, we could play it for 90 seconds and when the music stops.. Batter Up! Just an idea. Perhaps the rules committee will take that up.
If Glen were to have a pitcher warm up song, I might humbly suggest the Theme from Hogan's Heroes:
Did you know that song has lyrics?!?!? On YouTube one can find this theme as sung by four of the cast members: Robert Clary, Richard Dawson, Ivan Dixon, and Larry Hovis.
But I digress.
You see, if you were not aware, Glen's bum shoulder prevents him from pitching in a traditional, overhand fashion. He pitches underhand, and in return for that he is entitled to receive underhand pitching as well. Such terms are not universally available; one needs a doctor's note. Thus far, Glen has resisted my urging that he learn to pitch with his left arm. I think he should blow both shoulders before resorting to underhanded pitching, but that's just one wiffler's opinion.
Anyway, we played two games again this weekend. It always happens when we get together for a party on Saturday night. Once enough wifflers have had enough beer, they decide in magic unison, "We should play tomorrow!" Well the party in question was a fete for da Commish's 50th birthday at the OCC. I won't report on the party here, as I'm sure it will be well covered in the Oakwood Register. As Tim "Boog" Baker said, "It ain't a party until the police and fire fighters come."
So we played Sunday morning and Glen's pitching made the opposition look like a bunch of Werner Klemperers and John Banners. Look at these numbers for the weekend:
4 IP, 10 H, 5R, 6K
Now one would reasonably say that 5 runs in 4 innings is not good, but those all came in one inning on Saturday. The other three were scoreless innings. Scoreless!! That really should NEVER happen.
And: SIX Strikeouts!! Two of those were LOOKING!!
Dudes, he is pitching U-N-D-E-R-H-A-N-D!
It's dark magic, I tell ya. Anyway, stunningly, Glen was on the winning side for both games, a soggy 10-5 game on Saturday and the 12-0 pasting of the Gerries on Sunday.
Glen, Kurt - 10
Chris, Peter - 5
W: Mosser
L: Anderson
HR: None
Peter, Kurt, Tim, Bill - 0
Dave, Glen, Matt - 12
W: Lindsay
L: Berwald
HR: None.
Notes:
This has been a season with numerous one-timer appearances. We were pleased to be joined this morning by Bill Lee, who bears an uncanny resemblance to Huey Lewis.
We also welcomed Chris Anderson back to the asphalt for the first time in 2012. "Welcomed" is a relative term as Kurt and Glen roughed him up for 4 runs in his first inning.
Posts
Stats will be up later in the week.
ReplyDeleteeat shit! the underhand kid stays in the game!
ReplyDeleteI think your effectiveness speaks for itself. While you're gettin' it done, there's no reason to change.
Deleteok seriously? 12-0 even WITH bill? As a whiffle widow, I'm appalled!
ReplyDeleteAs a casual observer and follower of this blog, I have to say there's an awful lot of whining about The Artist and his underhand pitching. Poor fellow's got a serious injury and yet he shows up almost every week, game-face on and eager to play (from what I understand). What does he get for his troubles? Moaning and groaning and carping. Sheesh! It's enough to make a wiffle fan say, "screw it". Anyway, here's a solution - have the membership vote on one of the three options below:
ReplyDelete1. The artist doesn't pitch, just hits and fields
2. The artist pitches underhand but bats against all the normal wicked shit you mathletes toss
3. The artist quits
My understanding was always that the reason The Artist received underhand pitching was because his time on the mound generally meant inflated BAs for all players and it was therefore a way of leveling the playing field, so to speak. Secondly, if it was so much easier to hit underhanded pitching wouldn't The Artist's BA be considerably higher than it is? I mean, his ERA attests to the fact that he's much easier to hit against. Anyway, again, I'm just a casual observer, so perhaps my thoughts don't really matter. I know what they're saying on the streets: "The Artist Blows". Well, if I were him, I'd say, "Blow this!"
Well, except for the foul language, which I don't approve of, I want to thank this anonymous writer for coming to my defense. That said, I have to reiterate what I said at a closed-door subcommittee meeting recently: "these wifflers are the finest wifflers involved in today's wiffle game, or any era's wiffle game of wifflers, ever!" In fact, if the kind-heartedness and generosity of spirit of these, my wiffle brothers, were converted to eggs and thus consumed on a two egg per person, per day basis, they could stretch to the moon and back! I'm sure good faith and love for the game will keep this little imbroglio from turning into a situation. Remember fellas, though the reasons my wife would ever have agreed to marry me remain, alas, a mystery, it is better to have loved and lost than to have occupied the position of league proctologist.
DeleteIndeed. I will vouch for Glen's long distaste for cursing (with my fingers crossed behind my back).
Deleteam i the only one who think that the defense of glen (for which glen then expresses his thanks) was written by glen?
ReplyDeleteOne really shouldn't seek to expose an anonymous commenter with an anonymous comment.
DeleteOne really shouldn't seek to expose an anonymous commenter with an anonymous comment.
Deleteno, their written in completely different styles. the second one has that stupid nonsense stuff he used to put into his blog writing. the first is to straight.
ReplyDelete"They're"
Delete"Too"
Delete"There"
ReplyDelete"Two"
ReplyDelete"et tu, Brute"
ReplyDelete