New Rule for 2018!

It has recently come to the attention of Judicial Authorities that the Oakwood Wiffle & Ale Club Committee on Rules has not met in some time. At the same judicial proceeding an interpretation was requested of the following, little-known, proviso in the OW&AC Bylaws:

A well regulated Wiffleball Game, being necessary to the perpetuation of a free Club, the right of the Rules Committee to meet and make Rules, shall not be infringed.

This sacred, inviolable proviso has been interpreted to mean the Rules Committee can meet at any time, place, manner of its choosing and that its decisions are by definition right and true for the good of the Game. So there.

Accordingly, the Rules Committee recently met and has provided this report (see below) which we gratefully receive to our benefit. In case you are wondering, the meeting was properly noticed and advertised. It was posted on the community board at the back entrance to the Oakwood Dorothy Lane Market - right behind the plastic bag recycling bin. If you missed that - it is your OWN fault. Period.

Anyhooo.. the following Committee Report is provided:

REPORT OF THE BASEBALL-WIFFLEBALL EQUIVALENCE SUB-SUB-COMMITTEE OF THE COMPETITION SUB-COMMITTEE OF THE OW&AC COMMITTEE ON RULES.

The sub-sub-committee takes seriously its mandate to continuously evaluate options for making our great wiffle Game an asymptotically better approximation of the game of Baseball. We have recently focused on an area in which our Game can better match baseball rules and at the same time restore the critical balance between Pitcher and Batter that can, in proscribed circumstances, go awry.

It has been the case for centuries that to complete a strikeout the catcher must cleanly catch the third strike pitch. If the catcher muffs such catch, or if the pitch bounces, the catcher must either tag the batter out or throw the ball to first base for a "force out" (recorded as 2-3). The batter in such a moment may attempt to reach first base safely by manner of "running."

The sub-sub-committee notes the sad absence of any equivalent for this rule in our Game. Also noted is the strict prohibition on "running." Therefore the following rule shall be enforced starting with the 2018 Championship Season:

"IF a batter should swing and miss for strike three on a wiffle pitch that bounces on the ground before striking the Wall, the following matrix shall determine the outcome of such at bat:

1. If there are less than 2 outs and a runner is at first base the batter is OUT, by Strikeout.
2. If there is no runner at first base or there are 2 out (regardless of runner case) the following shall apply:
   a. A new CATCHER'S CIRCLE with a radius of 54 and three-quarters inches shall be drawn on the asphalt from the point at the base of the Wall directly below the center of the Strike zone. See accompanying diagram for visual aid.
   b. If after striking the Wall the pitched ball comes to rest within the Catcher's Circle, the Batter shall be Out by Strikeout.
   c. If after striking the Wall the pitched ball exits the Catcher's Circle in fair territory from its own momentum the batter shall be Out by K2-3.
   d. If after striking the Wall the pitched ball exits the Catcher's Circle in foul territory from its own momentum the batter shall be Safe at First Base by K-Wild Pitch.
   e. If the batter should exit the batters box before any of the above determinations are made, he shall be deemed to have abandoned his opportunity to reach base and shall be Out by Strikeout.
   f. If the batter intentionally touches the pitched ball after it strikes the Wall in order to impede, change, direct, influence, redirect, or otherwise affect the natural momentum of the ball he shall be out by Strikeout and at least one outfielder shall immediately yell, "DEPLORABLE!" in a voice of sufficient volume to be heard by the guy across Aberdeen Avenue who insists on mowing his lawn during EVERY GAME.
3. Runners aboard who are forced shall advance; if a runner should be advanced by force to score, the batter shall be credited with 1 (one) RBI.
4. The Commissioner shall with all due haste construct a tool for the accurate and correct drawing of this Catcher's Circle."

Diagram:

Your compulsory acquiescence to this rule is appreciated. The  Committee on Rules hopes the rest of your April is as great as our great Game.

END OF REPORT

So there it is! We can't wait to get out there and play our new, better Wiffleball!!