The Descent to Professionalization

I see a sad era coming. Take a look at this...

Can you believe that it has come to this? Pay-to-Play? Uniforms? Team captains? Five-ball walks?? Games on Sundays???

BASE RUNNING!!!!!!????????

Ah, but do they keep score? Doesn't say. These YMCA programmers are POSERS. I'm glad we've got our ol' pick-up league without all their restrictions and precise base paths and fences. Raise a glass to the OW & AC, comrades!

So it Always Goes

There is a situation in OW&AC that needs to be brought out in the open. You see, when you let in a nerd like me, and the nerd starts insisting that there be rules and stats, you end up with things like this:

"Attendance at Theory shall be counted in the stats." 

Now this seems as clear a statement of a rule that one could possibly craft, no? But all rules end up begatting judgments, interpretations, and clarifications! This one is no different. And so we have a problem - not that you let me in - but that you humored me! And here we are now trying to wrap our minds around what is "Theory"?

You see, yesterday, at 15:21 (by my e-mail) Kurt Mosser declared an "Emergency Theory" at tanks at 16:00-ish.  I was under the impression that only Brent could call a Theory, but I'm not qualified to be considered an expert. Reports are that Kurt and Dave (R-OH) showed and downed a few and are self-satisfied that they went to "Theory."

[Incidentally, if you could be a fly on the wall for a Mosser/Eldridge tete-a-tete theory-- what would you rather hear them discuss: wiffle pitching or US politics?]

So, now I put it to the 99% (i.e. those who can't hit their pitching): what makes a gathering of wifflers a Theory? If Kurt sends an e-mail and calls a Theory at Tanks 39 minutes hence, is that a Theory? If the Mackintoshes and the Berwalds both happen to be chaperoning the Sadie Hawkins Dance - is that a Theory? If Dave Bush is walking out of Graeter's just as Eric Zamonski is walking in, is that a Theory? If I see Chris Anderson at DLM, don't talk to him, but there is a wine tasting going on and we can smell the roasting chicken - IS THAT A THEORY??

I don't know. This is the problem with rules! I'm so sorry.

So, let's say it was a theory and update the Theory standings...

Name	T	G
Mosser	2	0
Anderson	1	0
Baker, T	1	0
Cebulash	1	0
Eldridge	1	0
Mackintosh	1	0

There'll be some prideful boasting on Aberdeen, I'm sure. Another stat in which Kurt leads the league. 

Big Honk!

Small Sample Size - But Leading the League Nonetheless

So spoke the rules committee on January 13: "Attendance at Theory shall be counted in the stats."

Here are the results of the first theory of 2012:

Name	T	G
Anderson	1	0
Baker, T	1	0
Cebulash	1	0
Mackintosh	1	0
Mosser	1	0

T = Theory; G = Games

So, here we have the early leaders in our new statistical category, presented alphabetically, by the way. But don't despair, Whifflers, it's a looooong season and there will be plenty of time to catch these guys in the standings.

Except Kurt. No one's going to out-theory Mosser.