"Go Play in Traffic"

Children's Bike Rodeo Displaces Weekly Wiffle Tradition

That above is the proper headline. What follows is the "story" of our itinerant morning of wiffle ball:

City trucks and police vehicles on the hallowed asphalt made the situation clear - there would be play on Nance Bradds Field, but it would not be the Oakwood Wiffle and Ale Club on this Saturday. Today, the Oakwood Safety Department would be imparting the skills of safe, enjoyable cycling to the next generation of car free Oakwood youth.

Like Moses, da Commish led his flock of dejected, rejected wiffle ball savants to the new promised land...

Chester A. Roush Field

Brent rips a double off Kim

The grounds at "The Roush" have some drawbacks - the pavement is not level, the parking space lines are not aesthetically pleasing, there was a steady wind whilst we played in the shadow of the stadium. But least convivial of all - it is basically a through street. Play was stopped numerous times to allow cars to traverse the diamond. Frankly it would have been safer to play amongst the toddlers on bikes.

So that's the story; we risked our lives to play wiffle in an unsafe locale so that the children could learn to joys of cycling. Put another way - we are saints.

That is not how other news agencies have reported this story, however. To wit, headlines and samples from from around the news biz about our adventure:

Fox News:

Wiffler Dems Decry "Police Activity"

Dayton Daily News:
[Actually the DDN just picked up an AP wire copy for this report]

Dayton Daily News Neighbors Section

Oakwood Families Pleased Police Evicted Vagrants from Playground

with a small sidebar:
Kettering Families Concerned By Sudden Influx of Vagrants

Oakwood Register:

Delightful Bike Rodeo Finally Brings Life to Unused Schoolyard

The Register piece will elicit a letter to the editor one week later bemoaning that the children of Oakwood cannot find their own fun without it being developed, managed and of course FUNDED by the nanny state. This letter will bring forth a reply penned by Kurt Mosser, under the pseudonym of "Eric Zamonski," which will take apart the prior letter and deride its author in a way only highbrow liberal intellectuals will understand.  Most readers will think Kurt was thanking the Oakwood Mom's Club for volunteering at Wright Library. Brilliant.

Anyway a game was played and Peter hit two home runs in the same inning off Hansoo. These were soaring, arcing blasts to left, that captured the full majesty of this great game. Not even the outfield of Brent and Eric ("The Unstoppable Wall") could prevent these blasts.

Looks like Hansoo had a homer of his own later. Game ended in a tie.

Brent, Eric, Hansoo - 3
Kim, Matt (part time), Peter - 3

Full stats will be uploaded later (maybe Sunday). Whenever. Complete stats through this game are now up to date. Allow me to say, Hansoo Ha is having a fine season.