Today's Improbables

The puddle broom was out Saturday morning at NBF, but so was the Sun, and aside from a short porch in Left-Center to accommodate Lake Homer, the water thankfully wasn't too much of a factor.  (Things to buy:  glitter chalk, waterproof chalk, more balls)  The game turned out to be a rare one-sided rout with the Vans vaulting past the Hapless Hans pretty much the whole game.  Team selections are usually really competitive but you knew something was amiss when Zamonski started off 4-4, was leading his team in RBIs, and then HOMERED fer chrissakes.  Whatever got into that guy don't worry, it won't last.  They certainly didn't hire him for his bat.  

This week's game was asterisked in a more procedural way as well.  Multiple members of The Halens had to boogie early so the Vans traded Zack to the opposing team for the final innings.  Which makes the scoresheet look odd by hey, the show went and wiffleball continued which is what counts.   

The league simultaneously welcomed, and wished happy trails to, cuppa coffee A J "Plankton".  A J was visiting from the OK state and padded his playing stats with that week's winning trivia answer on Wednesday night, which definitely counts as Ale points.  Breviti, versatili, triviali.

Reminder to anybody reading:  BUY MORE WIFFLE BALLS!  Tis the season for those wintered-over inventory wiffleballs to crack, and windy days bring hungrier rooftops.  

Reminder #2:  Next week is Oakwood's That Day In May Parade which occupies Shafor Blvd all morning and closes it off to all cross-traffic.  So if your normal route to NBF is by coming off Shroyer, as mine is, you will have to reroute and get to the field from Far Hills Ave.   

Adrian, Eric, Matt, Pete, Walker, Zack  -  19

Brad, J D, Mark, A J, Rob [Zack]  -  3?

Home Runs  -  Eric (!), Matt, Pete, Walker, Zack, Brad

Catalepsy on a Hot Thin Spoof

It turned into a glorious morning for Wiffleball, not warm, but sunny and nice and the mild breeze coming in towards the batter made the fielding interesting.  Lots of uncatchable diving doubles resulted which likely boosted the overall ribeye count for the day.  Scoringwise it was a good ol' seesaw affair with multiple lead changes, and nip and tuck until the very last out of the game.  Mound defense was a big factor, possibly also due to the wind.  But it led to some ferociously feline forays, with Matt The Cat catapulting to cataclysm, much to the caterwalling of the hapless hitters.  Zack had the only swing hard enough to overcome the weird wind, and even that one died just barely beyond the line.  Oddly though nobody ever popped one back to the roof, which you'd think would've happened alot today.  Today wasn't the *official* opening day game of the season but it sure had that feeling.  Great to be back and see everybody!  

Adrian, Eric, JD, Zack  -  9

Mason, Matt, Pete, Rob  -  6

HR  -  Zack

The Johnny Vander Meer of Not Swinging

Sun drenched, heat soaked, baked out like sauerkraut.  This week's game contained all of the usual friendly rivalries, but really we were all battling one common enemy:  the heat.  It was unrelenting.  First guys on the mound got to pitch in the shade at least but then that was it.  Just sucking on heat index til the last strike was mercifully recorded and we could all slink away to go sip ice water in our respective ACs.  

Commish showed up bright and early to set things up and pick teams, but then had to immediately beat it to go attend to some important day drinking---er, I mean "event planning" for Walker's impending nuptials.  Which I'd not known about, congrats big guy!  

Gamewise, it was a fun seesaw affair with three lead changes.  The Vaunted Vans plated two in their first frame but then the Happenin' Halens harangued them for four to grab the lead.  Then it was tied, and finally the Visitors were Victorious with one last ribbie that would prove the gamewinner.  Teams were well-matched all around but it wouldn't have been a one-run squeaker if the Home Team Homies hadn't been so brilliant in the field.  Zack pulled off a rare legit slapback play beyond the wall to convert a Brad HR into a triple which ended up saving a run.  But this week's DRS leader was clearly "Tyler Wells" Andy who strapped on the velcro suit and turned in three, count em three, Gorilla Glue™ stickyfinger nabs-o-the-day.  Who says ballplayers aren't athletes!    

Re the blog title:  I took two consecutive pitches without swinging which Zack guessed was probably an all-time personal record.  Which led to me dubbing myself the titular character.  

Adrian, Brad, Eric, Jeff  -  7

Andy, Jim, Rodney, Zack  -  6

HRs  -  Jeff (2), Andy

Rookies Rippin' It

Nance Bradds Field saw a morning game as ooey-gooey as a Bill's frosted sprinkle in the sun, but it didn't seem to slow down the new guys.  OWAC welcomed Rodney to the league and he marked his debut by homering in his first-ever game, which is pretty hard to do against veteran pitching.   It would also turn out to be his team's only run.  On the Home Team side, Mason, also a freshmen, also klonked a nice longball.  Which is exactly one more HR than Zamonski hit today.  Or last season.  Or the season before that...  Speaking of rookies, cameo appearances today included Zack's cute-as-a-button son who, although refusing to cheer on the old man, is showing some early promise as a fielder.  Go kid!    

Tree Rule Reference:  today the tree rule came into play---or almost did, if JD had caught it falling out of the branches.  I was sure I remembered we'd altered the rule to allow for falling out of the tree catches to be an out but Commish disagreed and upheld the automatic homerun interpretation.  However...while writing this blog I happened to stumble back across a blog writeup from Oct 17, 2020, "Spank You For Your Service", which appears to indicate that then-Pete disagrees with now-Pete.  It has been five years after all, plenty of time for a wiffle rule to become urban legend, then regular legend, legend to become myth etc.  In any case see what you think, seems at least worth revisiting.  Especially if players not named Jeff are gonna be mashing tree shots as well.  Who did hit that one today btw?  

https://thisweekinwhiff.blogspot.com/2020/10/spank-you-for-your-service.html

Eric, JD, Rodney, Zack  -  1

Andy, Mason, Walker  -  7

HRs:  Andy (2), Mason, Walker, Rod Carew Argent King Stewart Dangerfield

Precious And Few Are The Moments We Two Can Throw At The Guy's Head

It was a dazzlingly sunny October morn with temperatures that, like the Channel Islands in WWII, or my pitching, started off nippy but ended up aiding and comforting the enemy.  The vaunted, vintage Vans of Eric-JD-Mark struck early and appeared dominant.  But the Hardy Halens' fielding and batting slowly warmed to the task and they death-by-papercutted the Guys in the White Hats until they'd captured the lead, never to relinquish.  Before he had to dash off early, Zack turned in one of the highest density quality innings you could want:  mowed us down in succession, raced to the plate as leadoff batter, went yard immediately, grabbed his stuff and vanished in a cloud of dust before we knew what hit us.  Fielding was really the theme today tho.  The first two (eventually meaningless) batters of the day got on on two consecutive dropped pop-ups, due mostly to cold hands and a truly blinding morning sun.  But from then on out it seemed everybody brought their track shoes and ate their wheaties today because half the ABs ended in somebody scampering over to snag an out.  With the exception of Pete's 800 or so hard slappers straight to the edge of the pitchers mound which I don't think anybody managed to field off their shins.  Oh, and there were donuts and a brief timeout for some Amish-looking dude and his kids.  All part of the show, folks!  

Eric, JD, Mark ............................... 18 hits, 6 runs

Adrian, Peter, Walker, Zack .......... 21 hits, 8 runs

HRs  =  JD, Walker, Zack

That 14-3 Day in May

So let's just leave it at this: 

Everyone on the winning team had as many (or more) SINGLES than everyone on the losing team had.. AT BATS.

Here are some "action" shots from today's fixture:

Basically Unhittable

Not Enough Hitting

Hansoo, Isaac, Jeff: 14 runs, 31 hits

Eric, JD, Matt, Peter: 3 runs, 11 hits

HR: Jeff (5)

How do YOU spell shellacking? Schellaque?

Proving the Fallacy

They say wiffle is all offense. "Home Run Derby!" "Ghost Runners!"

Well, today's clash of wiffle warriors went 9 innings and saw not one.. not three.. but TWO runs score the whole morning.

Leadoff solo homer by Brad. Ninth inning solo home by J.D. That's it. That's the list! 

Two-Nothing visitors.

By the way (no way to prove this but) Zach - reigning MVP not withstanding - may have had teh worst wiffle day ever. 0-for-6 is the start but he managed to make three of those outs on FOUL BALLS. He also surrendered the first inning, thus "game winning" homer.

Rough shakes, Zach. You'll get 'em next time.