The Johnny Vander Meer of Not Swinging

Sun drenched, heat soaked, baked out like sauerkraut.  This week's game contained all of the usual friendly rivalries, but really we were all battling one common enemy:  the heat.  It was unrelenting.  First guys on the mound got to pitch in the shade at least but then that was it.  Just sucking on heat index til the last strike was mercifully recorded and we could all slink away to go sip ice water in our respective ACs.  

Commish showed up bright and early to set things up and pick teams, but then had to immediately beat it to go attend to some important day drinking---er, I mean "event planning" for Walker's impending nuptials.  Which I'd not known about, congrats big guy!  

Gamewise, it was a fun seesaw affair with three lead changes.  The Vaunted Vans plated two in their first frame but then the Happenin' Halens harangued them for four to grab the lead.  Then it was tied, and finally the Visitors were Victorious with one last ribbie that would prove the gamewinner.  Teams were well-matched all around but it wouldn't have been a one-run squeaker if the Home Team Homies hadn't been so brilliant in the field.  Zack pulled off a rare legit slapback play beyond the wall to convert a Brad HR into a triple which ended up saving a run.  But this week's DRS leader was clearly "Tyler Wells" Andy who strapped on the velcro suit and turned in three, count em three, Gorilla Glue™ stickyfinger nabs-o-the-day.  Who says ballplayers aren't athletes!    

Re the blog title:  I took two consecutive pitches without swinging which Zack guessed was probably an all-time personal record.  Which led to me dubbing myself the titular character.  

Adrian, Brad, Eric, Jeff  -  7

Andy, Jim, Rodney, Zack  -  6

HRs  -  Jeff (2), Andy

Rookies Rippin' It

Nance Bradds Field saw a morning game as ooey-gooey as a Bill's frosted sprinkle in the sun, but it didn't seem to slow down the new guys.  OWAC welcomed Rodney to the league and he marked his debut by homering in his first-ever game, which is pretty hard to do against veteran pitching.   It would also turn out to be his team's only run.  On the Home Team side, Mason, also a freshmen, also klonked a nice longball.  Which is exactly one more HR than Zamonski hit today.  Or last season.  Or the season before that...  Speaking of rookies, cameo appearances today included Zack's cute-as-a-button son who, although refusing to cheer on the old man, is showing some early promise as a fielder.  Go kid!    

Tree Rule Reference:  today the tree rule came into play---or almost did, if JD had caught it falling out of the branches.  I was sure I remembered we'd altered the rule to allow for falling out of the tree catches to be an out but Commish disagreed and upheld the automatic homerun interpretation.  However...while writing this blog I happened to stumble back across a blog writeup from Oct 17, 2020, "Spank You For Your Service", which appears to indicate that then-Pete disagrees with now-Pete.  It has been five years after all, plenty of time for a wiffle rule to become urban legend, then regular legend, legend to become myth etc.  In any case see what you think, seems at least worth revisiting.  Especially if players not named Jeff are gonna be mashing tree shots as well.  Who did hit that one today btw?  

https://thisweekinwhiff.blogspot.com/2020/10/spank-you-for-your-service.html

Eric, JD, Rodney, Zack  -  1

Andy, Mason, Walker  -  7

HRs:  Andy (2), Mason, Walker, Rod Carew Argent King Stewart Dangerfield

Precious And Few Are The Moments We Two Can Throw At The Guy's Head

It was a dazzlingly sunny October morn with temperatures that, like the Channel Islands in WWII, or my pitching, started off nippy but ended up aiding and comforting the enemy.  The vaunted, vintage Vans of Eric-JD-Mark struck early and appeared dominant.  But the Hardy Halens' fielding and batting slowly warmed to the task and they death-by-papercutted the Guys in the White Hats until they'd captured the lead, never to relinquish.  Before he had to dash off early, Zack turned in one of the highest density quality innings you could want:  mowed us down in succession, raced to the plate as leadoff batter, went yard immediately, grabbed his stuff and vanished in a cloud of dust before we knew what hit us.  Fielding was really the theme today tho.  The first two (eventually meaningless) batters of the day got on on two consecutive dropped pop-ups, due mostly to cold hands and a truly blinding morning sun.  But from then on out it seemed everybody brought their track shoes and ate their wheaties today because half the ABs ended in somebody scampering over to snag an out.  With the exception of Pete's 800 or so hard slappers straight to the edge of the pitchers mound which I don't think anybody managed to field off their shins.  Oh, and there were donuts and a brief timeout for some Amish-looking dude and his kids.  All part of the show, folks!  

Eric, JD, Mark ............................... 18 hits, 6 runs

Adrian, Peter, Walker, Zack .......... 21 hits, 8 runs

HRs  =  JD, Walker, Zack

That 14-3 Day in May

So let's just leave it at this: 

Everyone on the winning team had as many (or more) SINGLES than everyone on the losing team had.. AT BATS.

Here are some "action" shots from today's fixture:

Basically Unhittable

Not Enough Hitting

Hansoo, Isaac, Jeff: 14 runs, 31 hits

Eric, JD, Matt, Peter: 3 runs, 11 hits

HR: Jeff (5)

How do YOU spell shellacking? Schellaque?

Proving the Fallacy

They say wiffle is all offense. "Home Run Derby!" "Ghost Runners!"

Well, today's clash of wiffle warriors went 9 innings and saw not one.. not three.. but TWO runs score the whole morning.

Leadoff solo homer by Brad. Ninth inning solo home by J.D. That's it. That's the list! 

Two-Nothing visitors.

By the way (no way to prove this but) Zach - reigning MVP not withstanding - may have had teh worst wiffle day ever. 0-for-6 is the start but he managed to make three of those outs on FOUL BALLS. He also surrendered the first inning, thus "game winning" homer.

Rough shakes, Zach. You'll get 'em next time.

Towering Piso

There's something about Professors of Philosophy. In their prime - they can dominate this league.

Let us take a moment to appreciate the season we are witnessing from one Professor Zach Piso, PhD. Just another day at the park, Zach went 5-for-8 today with 2 singles, a double, a triple, and a homer. That's a cycle of course, and not the first he's hit this year.

The Double and the Triple were each the 10th of the year for him. He is now double digits in doubles, triples and homers.

That homer (and its 3 RBIs) added to his league leading tallies in those categories. Those sit now at 14 HR and 53 RBI.

Going 5-for-8 whilst Jeff went 3-for-8 means Zach now leads the league in BA at 0.518. So that's the Triple Crown, friends. Of course the season isn't over, but still - the numbers are stunning.

But in fact, right now Zach leads the league in...

1. Batting Average
2. Slugging Percentage
3. OPS
4. ABs (tied with Peter)
5. Hits
6. Doubles
7. Triples
8. Home Runs
9. Runs Batted In
10. Wins

That's the Ten-ple Crown!

The only categories he does not lead the league in are singles and walks. These are like 2014-2015 Kurt Mosser numbers. This is 2015 Bryce Harper-level stats right here, and we get to witness it every Saturday.

Eric, Finn, Jeff, Pete, Walker - 0 runs, 8 hits

Adrian, Hansoo, Isaac, Matt, Zach - 8 runs, 20 hits

HR: Zach (14), Adrian (2)

Wiffle Magic, Feel it Happen

While I think most would like to see their wiffle games end up with a score like 10-9, today's 3-2 contest had a certain charm to it. Certainly, the line of the day belonged to Zach: 6-for-9, homer-shy of the cycle, and 2 critical RBI in a game his team won by one run. He also pitched 2 scoreless innings. So, all in all a good day.

But did you hear about Stats' day? Matt, stalwart O's fan, went 2-for-11, with one RBI. His two hits, though, came in the same pivotal inning - the top of the 8th.  Matt led off the inning with a sharp single. This was followed by another hit to put 2 on. Then two outs brought Stats back to the plate with a tie score, two out and the go-ahead run in scoring position. Two strikes, and then a low liner just drops into the doubles area. Matt drove in himself for what proved to be the winning run.

He also pitched the bottom of the eighth. It turned out to be the only inning this year in which a pitcher got zero Ks, and also surrendered no runs. Shut. Down.

You may also not be aware that during Jeff's first inning on the mound - a 1-2-3 inning as per usual - Matt composed a three movement concerto for strings and bassoon.

While patrolling the outfield in the bottom of the fifth, Stats mediated a South American constitutional dispute over the authorities of the upper parliamentary chamber vis-à-vis the the supreme court. 

Further, Matt debunked the Zamonski Hypothesis on Rock & Roll and.. and developed an algorithm that, with 98.23% accuracy explains the adult contemporary chart pattern of Michael McDonald's yacht rock hits between 1979 and midway through 1982. 

Some scholars assert that Stats may have been the author of Merchant of Venice. However, claims that he also authored some of Shakespeare's sonnets are disputed.

But still, all in all - a good day.

Hansoo, Matt, Walker, Zach - 3 runs, 14 hits

Adrian, Andy, Eric, Jeff, Pete - 2 runs, 13 hits

HR: Evans (4, 1 on)